Two work random thoughts

[txlonghorn47]

Yeah I never got Colorados disdain for Texas. Got a lot of flack the couple times I went to Denver and Steamboat.

[12ozLongneck]

This might be worth a separate thread, but I am so sick of listening to the clams in this office wring their hands over nutrition. 1. Everything is "a chemical." 2. The word "toxin" is meaningless. WATER is toxic if you consume it in large enough quantities. 3. GMOs are not necessarily bad for you. 4. Just because something is "natural" does not mean it is superior. Cobra venom is natural but I doubt the alternative medicine shill in this office is going to make a vinaigrette out of that and put it on her stupid fucking kale anytime soon.

[Drew Corleone]

That is the kind of stuff you read on Facebook, too.

[txlonghorn47]

We've got the girl who thinks she's dieting and tells everybody about it, yet she's really not. For instance she told me all about how she's eating Paleo now while munching down on tempura fried shrimp the other day.

[Makaveli]

It took me a while to figure those people out. Like the "I run 5 miles every morning at 5am" crowd. Yet somehow they stay 30 lbs overweight. For the longest I was very discouraged like Damn I really have no shot whatsoever.

[12ozLongneck]

People overcomplicate this shit. When I eat in a non-retarded way more oft than not and exercise I am in decent shape. When I eat like shit and exercise sparingly for a year and a half or so I look like I do now. It is not that hard.

[txlonghorn47]

My problem is mostly the booze. Not only the empty calories from it, but it usually leads to me eating like crap as well.

[LMQueen]

My list of work pet peeves:


People who take the elevator down one floor. I wanted to throat punch two different people yesterday on my way out. I'm on 6, we had to stop at 5 for someone to go to 4 and on 3 for someone to go to 2.

Also, our building has two towers, East and West. The people from the East tower come to the West Tower to do their bombing runs. I don't know what these people are eating, but I'm pretty sure there is a dead animal in there somewhere.


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[Drew Corleone]

People who take the elevator down one floor. I wanted to throat punch two different people yesterday on my way out. I'm on 6, we had to stop at 5 for someone to go to 4 and on 3 for someone to go to 2.

My office is on the second floor. I will walk out or walk in alongside co-workers from time to time and invariably they head for the elevator while I head for the stairs. Then we'll arrive at the door at the same time. I want to give them the biggest WTF stare.

[eochs]

Don't be so quick to judge... I've had 5 knee surgeries and 2 back surgeries, if i can avoid a flight of stairs with an elevator i will... Just saying you don't always know why they are taking the elevator... 9/10 times yeah they are probably fat lazy americans, but 1/10 they are a fat lazy american with reason to take the elevator

[12ozLongneck]

Staying at the Hilton in St. Louis where they filmed part of Up In The Air. I should probably lick the toilet seat just in case Anna Kendrick did her business in here and they haven't cleaned it since then.

[txlonghorn47]

Please go to a bar and be overly obnoxious Stars fan tonight

[UTwiz]

Please go to a bar and be overly obnoxious Stars fan tonight

I've locked down this character here at San Diego bar. No one else in here cares about this game or even knows what hockey is, but it's still an important role to fill nonetheless.

[LMQueen]

Nice.


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[12ozLongneck]

Someone in our office just returned from a trip to Rome.

Old Weird Herpes Guy: "Did you go to The Louvre?"

[12ozLongneck]

I was just an unwilling participant in a conversation that began with the phrase "My dog's chiropractor...."

[12ozLongneck]

Guess who's back... Back again... LVG is back... Tell a friend...

This time she got involved with some guy via online dating, gave him a non-trivial sum of money (Exact amount was not disclosed) and, lo and behold, he disappeared! She really knows how to pick 'em.

[txlonghorn47]

Hahahahahaha wow!

[12ozLongneck]

Motorcycle Guy spent a few days in the hospital being pumped full of meds over the weekend after experiencing "delusions of religious grandeur." Sounds like a great environment in which to raise children!

[12ozLongneck]

Tomorrow's staff party agenda:

Potluck lunch!
White Elephant Gift Exchange!
Christmas Carol Charades!
Snowman Wrapping Contest!

My request to work remotely tomorrow was declined. Kill me.

[12ozLongneck]

The people you meet on SW Airlines:

1. I'm boarding in Group E but there will totally be room in the overhead baggage compartments for my steamer trunk sized suitcase guy

2. Hey you have an aisle seat in row 3. Would you mind moving to a middle seat by the shitter in the back row so my wife and I can sit together guy.

Die.

[eochs]

2. Hey you have an aisle seat in row 3. Would you mind moving to a middle seat by the shitter in the back row so my wife and I can sit together guy.
.

So did you move? I bet you moved

[U2-Horn]

That's when you tell the husband to sit in the back with his wife and send whoever she's sitting next to up to the front

[eochs]

or if the wife is hot you tell him she can sit up front next to, or on top of, you

[12ozLongneck]

That's when you tell the husband to sit in the back with his wife and send whoever she's sitting next to up to the front

I did not recommend it but this is what happened.